I met a guy, who made me hate xmas, who destroyed all the magic about the time and just let me think, hope it’s soon over. I met a guy who made me loose all my ingenuousness to go out with a stranger just met on the streets. I lost that feeling of just hugging someone when you feel happy without thinking about more. I met a girl who made me not asking others for favours anymore unless they call me friends. I met people I can never trust again, just because they are telling you over and over again the same stupid lie, and I met none who believes that a mobile got lost during the weekend and came back immediately the boring monday. where is the point of lying to people, i seriously dont get that. isn’t it better then just to say nothing or be honest, if the lie is obvious anyway.

All these destroyed magic moments, that loose of ingenuousness, naivety, innocence and pure friendlyness, made me feel sometimes that I lost the most important thing of my nature. Is being an adult just that you are afraid of opening your feelings, loosing all your reliance in people, forget about the naivety and trust nobody anymore until you are sure that they are trustful? but when does that moment of trust comes, after a months, a year, after an significant moment? we will never now. in the end it’s just a feeling we get, that we would call some people friends, but nobody can tell you that they will ever be your friends. People are changing in life, moving on, thats good, that makes life exciting.

but without that childlike innocence and naivety it is just a hassle. sometimes i wish to be still a child and not becoming older anymore. would be great of not being disappointed anymore. but once i met a guy who told me, you need to go through all this pain and stress on a journey to really appreciate what you get in the end.